Today was not such a great day. It is the middle of the day and my workday is not over, the old calculation for foreign-correspondent-workhours might not work today. That is not usual for a professional German journalist in New York. Not usual.

I got a phonecall from my editor. The editor was fuming. She does not smoke, but she fumed. She blamed me for a mistake. That is normal for a journalist. We get blamed all the time. Here is one rule for a professional German Journalist: Journalists do not make mistakes. How are you supposed to make a mistake, when you just report the facts and your opinon? I know my opinion. Those guys know the facts. Simply professional.

My Editor insisted. Here is the mistake I did not make. Hans Fritz does not make mistakes. Life does. Here is the mistake I did not make.
In German language, you capitalize everything you can touch: the Towel is on the Autobahn (you can touch the towel, and you can touch the autobahn – by the way: Germans like to put towels into different places to reserve a seat).

Hans Fritz would not touch this bee

Here is the mistake I did not make:

In my analysis of the financial crisis i wrote about cats and the president and the world.
Of course, as every German journalist writing in German would do, I tought: What would I touch? I would touch the cat. Check. Capitalized. Republicans. Sure, you can touch them. One of them shook my Hand after we had free lunch by invitation of Bayer Pharmazeuticals once. They always have good food. Republicans: Capitalized. Here is who you can not touch: The president. That is why I did not capitalize the word: president. That is how I did not made a mistake, as every professsional German journalist will agree. Now I am fuming. The End.